The language of miracles
By The Vancouver Sun July 14, 2008
I recently wrote that I was considering getting another pet to keep Sammee company, so that he wouldn't bark when I wasn't home. I had tried everything, but although he was a well-trained dog, his separation anxiety just wouldn't go away and I couldn't stand to see another angry note from the neighbours stuffed under my door.
Soon after that column appeared, I received an e-mail begging me not to give up. The writer said he could get rid of the separation anxiety in hours -- not days or weeks. I was skeptical, but decided give it a try.
"Separation anxiety is one of the most difficult problems to solve," admits Derek MacDonald, a dog behaviour therapist with Barkbusters. "When we deal with dogs that have behaviour problems, there are two things missing, leadership and communication.
"If the dog feels it is lacking strong leadership from the humans in the pack, it will assume the leadership role. As a leader, the dog's instincts tell him he is responsible for the rest of the pack's safety [the humans are the rest of the pack]. When your dog sees you leave, he can no longer be responsible for your safety and this causes the anxiety."
So, in other words, he isn't afraid to be alone -- he's afraid I can't handle myself without him? Talk about an ego killer.
But what about all those commands I taught him that he does so well? "There is a big difference between leadership and commands," explains MacDonald. "Dogs are good at learning commands, but there is a big difference between the two. I don't want to 'command' a dog not to jump; I want him to make the decision himself to not jump. I don't want to 'command' a dog not to bark; I want him to not feel the need to bark. This is true for any behavioural problem. Why? Because now he feels safe and secure due to your leadership."
But, according to MacDonald, the usual roll call of "sit," "stay" and "down" just doesn't cut it when it comes to pushing you to the head of the pack. "The other missing component is communication. We tend to speak to the dogs in our language, not theirs. We need to speak to the dog in a way that they completely understand."
Turns out, speaking dog is pretty easy! I learned to make some guttural throat sounds that mimic a low growl by the pack leader and how to use some small pockets filled with metal chain links that, when thrown on the ground near the dog, imitate the sound of a leader's warning snap. Managing stairs and doorways is of supreme importance, too (the leader always goes first, of course). Putting all those things together has magically transformed my dog from an anxious worrier who couldn't let me out of his sight, to a relaxed, well-behaved and -- most importantly -- quiet dog. I have been able to leave him at home for hours at a time without him uttering a peep, something I never would have thought possible -- all because I fired him and made myself the boss.
It really did only take a few hours, too!
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